I actually think being embarrassed when you’re alone is worse than being embarrassed in a large group of people. For example, when I’m in a large group of people and I trip on something in the street and fall down, I’m doing that weird, frantic laughing thing people do when they’re pretending not to be embarrassed and saying something like “haha guys, it IS funny that I fell down and flashed a bunch of random strangers in the process, I’m laughing WITH you at me!” When I’m alone and remember some embarrassing thing I’ve done recently (or five years ago), there’s no nonchalant show to put on. It’s just me remembering the time I got sick in public or whatever. Or, as was the case yesterday, it’s just me watching Big Bang Theory and realizing I’ve been saying “assuage” wrong my entire life. All I can do is sit there and think about how awkward people must’ve felt hearing me saying it wrong and not feeling comfortable telling me. Part of me is saying, “it’s more of a book word, you’ve probably only said it in your head while reading!” The reality is that I probably said it to someone really important and educated, or in a job interview or something. So I just sit there with my face burning in the privacy of my own home.
While perhaps not quite as embarrassing, I did remember how much of a complete moron I can be when I made these cookies. I was super excited about them. I got the original recipe off of Annie’s Eats, which probably made this more of a burn. As I’ve mentioned before, Annie has always struck me as being insanely competent. Just from her blog I can see that she’s a doctor, has kids, a beautiful and frequently updated blog, etc. I should just quit my life while I’m not ahead.
Anyway, so I was really pumped to make these cookies because they looked so attractive, didn’t take long at all, combined two of my favorite ingredients, and would allow me to chop up something, which always makes me feel way more legit than I actually am.
Unfortunately, not only is chopping up frozen candy way harder than you would think (picture candy flying off the cutting board as I try not to take off the end of my finger. Yeah. I’m pretty good at life), when you inexplicably use baking powder instead of baking soda your cookies look pretty freaking weird. They stayed almost exactly in the rounded shape they started out their time in the oven in.
I made some squashed down versions of these baking powder disaster cookies so that you guys could at least get an idea of what they were supposed to look like, but seriously you should go look at Annie’s if you’re unconvinced by these. Also even with baking powder, they were of course delicious. If you can move past your totally understandable condemnation of my baking failure, you should make these. With baking soda.
PS: For those of you reading along throughout my blog, I’m still compulsively checking law school websites and despite my hours of failed searching my friend found an I, Claudius ebook for me, for free, with 2 minutes of me mentioning my issue to him. In other words, Me: 0, Life: 2 (3 including the baking powder).
Very slightly adapted from Annie’s Eats.
- 1 1/2 cups peanut butter cups, divided into 1 cup and 1/2 cup piles and roughly chopped. (It’s easiest to cut these and keep them sort of whole in the cookies if you freeze them for a while before cutting them. An hour is too long. 30 minutes is good).
- 1 1/2 cups plus 2 tbsp all-purpose flour
- 6 tbsp cocoa (Annie used Dutch-process cocoa but after reading about it I chose not to. I’m sure either would be good).
- 1/2 tsp baking soda
- 1/2 tsp salt
- 3/4 stick butter, softened
- 1/2 cup sugar
- 1/2 cup brown sugar
- 1 egg
- 1 tsp vanilla extract
- 2 tbsp milk
- 1/4 cup plus 2 tbsp peanut butter
1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit. Line baking sheets with parchment or silicone mats.
2. Whisk together flour, cocoa, salt, and baking soda.
3. In empty electric mixing bowl, mix butter, sugar, and peanut butter on high speed until fluffy. Add egg, milk, and vanilla, mix for about 15-20 seconds.
4. Slowly mix in dry ingredients. With a spoon or spatula, gently fold in the 1 cup pile of peanut butter cups.
5. Spoon about 3 tablespoons worth (I used an ice cream scoop, but remember that mine didn’t spread as much as a normal cookie would) of dough into rounded balls on to lined baking sheets. Top each ball with several pieces of peanut butter cups from the remaining 1/2 cup.
6. Cook for 12-14 minutes. They look underdone when you take them out, but after a few minutes of cooling they’ll be normal. Cool for 10 minutes on pan, then transfer to wire rack.